Sunday, June 8, 2008

The Advent Of GCSA: Genoa City's Self-Absorbed

This week it became glaringly apparent that Genoa City's Finest (GCF) are far too self -absorbed to give a shit about anyone other than themselves. And thus, Nicki claims to "know nothing" about her new husband David's former wives both having died under mysterious circumstances; and likewise Victor learns only now that his soon-to-be-wife, Sabrina, lost her father when she was 12, and that she is estranged from her mother. Is this not a testament to the extreme self- absorption that plagues GCFs at every turn? Furthermore, after 24 years of service, all Victor has to say about Miguel is: "He was a nice man...I will miss him"???? Did anyone know anything about Miguel? Did anyone ever bother to ask? If these people can't even conjure up enough interest to find out about their spouse's past, why the hell would they care about the hired help?

The case of the disappearing office.
So does Jabot actually have offices for its executives, or do they simply work in the boardroom on a rotational basis? In fact, the only actual office is Nicki's, (formerly Jill's despite her higher order on the food chain, and is now relegated to the boardroom). So please, tell us, where is Cane's office? Brad's? Katherine's? Gloria's? Victoria's (just think she gave up an office with a nursery at Newman to work at Jabot). And David's? (He and Nicki share, but Nicki obviously has dibs over the desk. No matter, David's too busy betting on horses with the names, Nimble Nicki and the like). To see the rootlessness of the Jabot executives is officially taking a toll on us, nevermind what it must be doing to them. Jabot needs to admit that they are seriously screwed for space, and set up a cube farm in the boardroom pronto.

Miguel. We hardly knew you.
So after 24 years of stilted performance and fastidious service, our favorite manservant is officially gone. We are devastated. For us Miguel represented the very reason why we watched the show. His unbelievable inability to act was stupefying, but like a car wreck, we could never pry our eyes away. Miguel devoted the best years of his life to the Newman's, and what did he get in return? Nada. Zero. Well, unless you consider Nicki "thanking" him by sending the angel for the Christmas tree that "he used to fuss over until it was perfect". Gee thanks. Are you also planning on sending a bonus, of say, a couple million as well, after having to endure the insipidness of the Newman family for over 25 years - including countless milkshakes made for the likes of Noah, Cassie, and other children pawned off on him, so the parents could get to the business at hand of discussing their shallow and insignificant lives? Except for a few bright moments of when Miguel dated Esther (so cute how the 'help' like to date each other!) and when he punched out Veronica/Sarah's (former maid at the Ranch) boss, it's been all pretty exploitive (considering he was virtually held prisoner at the Ranch, denied of an outside life, and took on the role of chauffeur, nanny, butler, maid, cook, Victor's boy toy and confidant, all rolled into one). Taking care of his sick aunt is sounding pretty good about now. As far as the producers go, though...talk about missed opportunity: 24 years, and then one day he simply never comes back? No car crash, no plastic surgery gone wrong, no murder, no fire? Geez. What a jip.

Devon- no- fun-whatever-his-last-name-is.
Could Devon possibly be any more of a drag? Ever since the cochlear implant/frontal lobotomy, it's be all down hill for our puritanical friend. We much preferred 'hoodlum Devon' as opposed to 'self-righteous Devon' who judges and nit picks everyone around him. It's time the implant comes out and Devon loosens up a bit. The only thing that can save Devon at this point is a relapse into delinquency. We can only pray.

Framed portrait of the week.
John wearing what looks like a straitjacket in a framed photo displayed prominently at the Abbot mansion.

Look of the week.
It was a toss up between Sharon's "RV chic" (tight white pants, dowdy yellow shirt, and fake tan) and Jana's "Helen Keller chic"(a 1940s school marm meets German hospital outfit).

Dialogue of the week.
"The worst mistake a man can make is to believe his own hype. To believe that he is impervious to pain or defeat. That he is omnipotent".

WTF? How can this have possibly come from Victor's mouth when he is guilty of all of what he is condemning? Does he not consider himself omnipotent? Does he not believe his own hype? And finally, is his middle name not Victor "impervious to defeat" Newman?

Jack's response to Victor's buying a shark for $12 million is worth mentioning as well:

Sharon: "Why would he [Victor] buy the dead shark?
Jack: "Maybe he mistook it for a self-portrait".

Questions of the week.
1. Does resident half man/half beast, Phyllis Summers Abbott Newman seem disappointed that her husband's half brother, Adam, is no longer interested in flirting with her? Was the bra she wore to the gym to work out in her last ditch attempt to entice him, and alas to no avail?
2. Is it just us, or does 8 weeks at camp for an 11 year old boy border on abusive? Don't get us wrong, we are relieved that the show will be Noah-less for the next 8 weeks, but my god. Again, when is Social Services going to finally step in?
3. What exactly is the difference between a mansion and an estate? Jack holds the lowly position of possessing only a mansion, faced with Katherine's estate; mocking him at every turn.
4. Who was the lucky recipient of Noah's alleged first kiss this week (so grown up!). Sam?

6 comments:

Jill said...

Lol: Sam!! Bless his heart, his only friend...could be!
And i agree that Phyllis (i LOVE when you refer to her as the half man/half beast) does act like she is put out (no pun intended) that Adam doesnt fawn over her anymore. She makes up excuses to talk to him, cant wait to see where this goes!

Anonymous said...

Regarding Noah, I want to know why, if he's seemingly a baseball prodigy, he just got his own bat during the pre-camp shopping excursion. Whose bat has he been using until now? Didn't the coach ever take Nick or Jack aside and tell them that every kid is expected to supply his own equipment? And did the kid who's been loaning Noah his bat all this time ever say "Hey dude, you live in a 'mansion.' Get your own bat?" This puzzles me.

buddysnuddys said...

Oh, it was also nice how Nicki and Victor send Miguel the clock. I think Victor said something like, "Yes, he used to wind this all the time." Seriously? Also, I have decided that I am going to move to Genoa City and open a gym. Obviously, I'll either have to attach it to the coffee shop or the Restless Style/Newman Modern Art Gallery because it's too much to ask anyone to travel any further, but I think I can make a good living based on the sad excuse for a gym at the GCAC. And just think of the gossip I can "overhear"... Squee!

rhoda said...

jack observation that victor bought a self portrait was priceless.

and i totally noticed phyllis' slutty sports bra. ew.

Anonymous said...

I think Phyllis is a beautiful woman and looks nothing like a man or beast.

Anonymous said...

My husband says Phyllis has a horse face.