Saturday, March 15, 2008

GC's Divas, Disillusioned and the Damned (Mar 10-14)

Absurdity reigns high in GC this week when Michael finally admits the truth that we have known all along: the food at the Genoa City Athletic Club blows goats. During a dinner party at Gloria's (consisting of surprise, surprise, take-out from the GCAC), Michael questions the sincerity of Gloria's relationship with Jeffrey, making a comparison to the food at the the club: "Something doesn't smell right, and it's not just the take-out". Could this be the end to the incessant fawning by its denizens over the bucatini or rib eye steak like it's god? Equally absurd was Gloria's claim that she "wants to grow old" in the Abbott Mansion, forgetting of course, that she already is old. And Esther in her ridiculously degrading maid uniform, made an appearance this week, always a crowd pleaser in that watching-someone-make-an-ass-out-of-themselves-way. And the capper? Nick's claim that ad space in their magazine (that hasn't even had one hit yet) is in the half a million range, leading us to think that Nick's real calling is a career in stand-up.

Sisters are doing it for themselves...
Do you know that song Nicholas? Because, it's certainly not brothers doing it for themselves like you are trying to pass off. You keep trying to convince everyone, including yourself, that you are doing this new magazine venture on your own, without any help at all from your zillionaire father, suggesting somehow that borrowing against your sizable trust fund falls under the "doing it on your own" umbrella. Your creativity is truly unending.

Ghosts crowd the young child's fragile eggshell mind.
In the case of Jack Abbott, Jim Morrison's quote would read more aptly "Ghosts crowd the middle-aged adult's fragile eggshell mind". Doesn't quite have the same poetic ring, but nevertheless very applicable to the apparent fragility of Jack's faculties as he continues to normalize his relationship with his father's phantasm. This already twisted relationship was taken one step further this week while Jack and his father's ghost watched Gloria make out with her new husband, and instead of being mortified at seeing his gold-digging ho of an ex-wife bed another man, John's ghost berates Jack for not having sold Gloria his half of the house. What? Even in death these people are totally convoluted.

We think John's ghost should stop being such a pantywaister, loosen up a bit, maybe hook up with Morrison in the afterworld, smoke a little weed, and trade in his black turtleneck and borrow Morrison's black leather pants: we'd all be better off for it.

Dialogue to be ashamed of.
Gloria claims that she is no longer up for consummating her marriage with Jeffrey when she finds a book of John's that was supposedly buried with him. Jeffrey's response?
"This is the first time a ghost has come between me and hot passionate sex".

Which begs the question: is this kind of dialogue legal?

Questions of the week.
1.Will Mrs. C. admit in her memoirs how abusive she has been to Esther over the past 25 years? Will her condescension and insistence on Esther wearing the infuriatingly degrading maid uniform be disclosed as well?
Does anyone else feel sorry for Devon? Talk about demotion. His character seems to have peaked with the cochlear implant storyline and never recovered. God knows, we haven't.
3. How is it that John doesn't know the truth about Gloria and the face cream considering the number of conversations that have gone on between Jeffrey and Gloria in the Abbott house? What kind of ghost does he pretend to be anyway?
4. Does Katherine Chancellor have a nervous tick that involves picking the lint and brushing the dandruff of other people's collars when she's talking to them? This week Daniel was targeted and looked genuinely surprised over her socially inappropriate behaviour.
5. Why didn't Amber, Kevin and Daniel donate the money anonymously to charity instead of burning it up? Oh wait, we forgot, that would mean thinking of someone other then themselves. Impossible.

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