Saturday, September 6, 2008

All Work and No Play, Makes Victor a Dull Boy. All Work and No Play Makes Victor a Dull Boy...

Victor Newman proves once again what an emotional infant he is, indulging in one big temper tantrum lasting weeks, and spanning an entire continent. When Nikki finds him in a dilapidated shack on a Mexican beach in a pile of his own filth (with surprisingly practical footwear), he turns on Nikki, channeling his best Jack Nicholson in The Shining, and decimates her fragile eggshell ego with, "our love is a sick love: a love that must die", leaving her grief-stricken (and extremely hungover) in a collapsed heap on the beach. He proceeds to storm off swearing that he will never again return to Genoa City. This proclamation is short lived, however, since hours later, he ends up back in said city replacing his Jack Nicholson- inspired performance with a Marlon Brandon-inspired performance a la Godfather (minus the cotton balls in his cheeks). Holed up in his study with Michael Baldwin as his "adviser"(think Robert Duvall as Vito Corleone's attorney), he instructs Michael as to whom he will see and when, all the while displaying minimal emotional affect with maximum destructive results. Hence, he fires his son, Adam, and banishes him from the Ranch. Likewise, he coldly asks Victoria and Nick to "leave him alone", and fires his entire staff without any kind of severance package or holiday pay. His perennial puerile actions make us question our "love" for him and for the show in general: perhaps this too is a "sick love" , one that must die?

Get thee to a boarding school.
A theme we have explored ad nauseum, is that of child neglect (or rather, child forget), a syndrome that runs rampant among Genoa City's Finest (GCF). As demonstrated this week, this neglect is not relegated solely to the wealthy, whose lives are too full of scheming, cheating, and dining on mediocre food at the Athletic Club to care for one's child; Esther, the lowly maid, is just as guilty as the rest. Her psychopathic daughter, Chloe/Kate is one f'ed up cookie as years of child neglect is oft to do. Boarding school from the ripe young age of 5 (thanks to Mrs. C) in a country that your mother can't locate on the map (Switzerland), is a recipe for disaster indeed. It serves Esther right that her own child is now ordering her to wait on her hand and foot, which Esther does willingly. We reckon this is what happens when your brain is the size of a walnut. And, oh yeah, the father of your child is a plumber named "Tiny".

Dude looks like a lady. For real.
When Sharon agrees to allow Noah to go to public school (shirking his duties as a trustafarian), he excitedly refers to her as "dude". Not surprisingly, his mother was none too thrilled about this designation and urged him not to refer to her as a dude again (or was it "dud"?) . In our view Noah's sobriquet for his mother is not too far fetched given that Sharon is looking more and more like a dude with each passing day thanks to a "high-class" mullet that just won't go away. You know, a mullet: short in the front, long in the back. And thus, dude from the front, broad from the back.

New Drinking Game.
As drinking seems to be the only way for one to get through a full episode of Y&R these days, we have been thoughtfully compiling a list of of suggestions for drinking games. Past suggestions have had the participant take a drink every time:
1. Phyllis punctuates a sentence with, "definitely, yeah, definitely..."
2. Someone dramatically slams shut their flip phone (thankfully the unflippable Blackberry phone is making it's way onto the show)
3. A comatose Victoria's monitor would go off signaling imminent death.
4. etc....

And now for this week's addition. Take a drink every time:
Someone proclaims (for either Jabot or Newman): "I'm the new CEO".

Questions of the week.
1. How do the local Mexicans feel when Nikki refers to where they live as "some godforsaken strip of beach"? We think it none too wise for a rich, solo, drunk gringa to be mouthing off as such.
2. Who in their right mind would let their young daughter go alone to serve food to some hot-tempered, disheveled, on-the-run gringo living in a run-down shack on the beach, as was the case of the young girl who would bring Victor scraps of food?
3. Is Adam so socially challenged that he can't comprehend how Neil could take being fired by him personally?
4. Is Jack's obsession with Victor bordering on homoerotic?

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